It's Time to Let Go of the Myth of the Eternally Clean House

A few weekends ago, I was looking forward to (another) quiet Saturday at home. Like a lot of us, I've been pretty worn down recently. The reality of a full year of pandemic living is weighing on me, like it is on so many, and I was hoping to intentionally engage in some activities that would help me feel a tiny bit renewed on Monday morning: a very long, very hot shower, an afternoon spent on my couch with an absorbing novel, a glass of wine with an indulgent takeout meal. I knew what I could do to help restore myself a little: Instead, I spent the weekend cleaning.

It started with what was supposed to be a quick straightening up of the kitchen before I settled onto the couch. Before I knew it, I was vacuuming, mopping, doing endless loads of laundry, feverishly wiping down dusty walls — the tasks that needed to be completed before I could actually relax seemed to stretch on endlessly. Hours later, as evening fell outside, I looked around my house and felt unsatisfied, frustrated, and even more anxious than before.